6 years ago
Friday, April 27, 2012
Autumn's turning 5
Autumn will be 5 in a couple of weeks. I always get teary eyed when I talk about Autumn. I don't know what it is. Even if I am talking to Drew I get emotional. He says it's because I love her so much, and while that's true- I still wonder why water works begin when I converse about her. She made me a mother. She bears the name that I always dreamed my child would have. She is beautiful, talented, smart, and kind. And she's mine.
When Autumn was an infant she was so incredibly difficult, I cried a lot those first 4 months. :) Then she was fine, and was a normal developing child- hitting milestones and I was enjoying being a mom on a different level. Then the terrible 2's hit, which were very very hard, and I cried a lot. Then came the 3's and there was a beautiful intervention- her preschool. Her coping skills became stronger, her communication barrier was diminishing and our relationship was getting better. Then came turning 4 and it was like a whole new child. :) Now she's almost 5 and it keeps getting better. She has truly gotten better with age!
I think I cry and get emotional when I talk about Autumn because those first few years all I did was cry, I was so confused and worried about what she needed and she was always so demanding of my time and emotions- and I cried a lot. So I still cry- I get teary eyed when I have a wonderful meeting with Autumn's teacher, I get misty eyed when I relay the information to my family. And shockingly enough- I cry when I really sit down and think about her going to Kindergarten next year. I have been so anxious for Autumn to go to school all day- but now my baby girl has really grown up, and I know I will miss her.
She's what I wanted so badly for so long. When I wrote papers in school about what I wanted to be when I grew up I talked about her. We were only married 3 months and I was telling Drew I wanted a baby...and she came 3 days after our anniversary. She has helped shape and mold me into who I am today. She took me from being "April" and turned me into "mommy", "mom", & "momma." All these tears, are exactly why Drew says they're there...because I love her so much, and can't imagine our family without her.
Posted by April Hardy at 9:11 PM